Hugs & Quiches

by | Sep 6, 2016

“Good friends help you to find important things when you have lost them… your smile, your hope, and your courage” 

Doe Zantamata


By Reesa Stone


Several years ago, I invited a woman I had just met to an informal get-together. “It’ll be fun”, I told her in an email, “you’ll meet lots of new people”. “No thanks”, she answered back, “I don’t need to meet more people. I have enough friends.”


I still don’t understand what she meant. How do you have enough friends? You can never have enough friends.[1] It’s not always easy to make friends. You need to find someone with common interests, who understands you and whom you understand, and most importantly, someone who wants to be friends.


(I’ve met more people than I thought possible who ‘have enough friends’, and aren’t particularly friendly. But I usually win them over; what can I say? I’m a charmer…..)


At difficult times, sometimes the ear or the shoulder of a good friend is all you need to get through, to persevere. A good friend is even better than a large serving of chocolate chocolate chip ice cream. Hard to believe, I know.


And so, after a particularly difficult week, I spent a morning at the Kotel, and the afternoon at lunch with friends.Here’s a funny thing. Before that lunch, I had never met several of my friends.But I knew them instantly when I saw an impressive group of ladies walking in the street.“Hi”! I said to them. “I’m Reesa”.“Oh!! Reesa!! It’s Reesa, everyone! Oh it’s so lovely to see you!” And one by one they all gave me a hug.Five, six, seven, eight hugs. Like friends, you can never have too many hugs.


These friends are a ‘virtual’ group of friends; a group of women who speak to each other mostly online, on Facebook; who share their days, their anxieties, their pains, their joys, their lives with each other, with no judgement or arguments, but with understanding, empathy, compassion, and appreciation.You really can’t have too many of those kind of friends. On a certain level, I have little in common with these women; they are intelligent, lovely, attractive, talented. Áll I’ve got going for me is that I can make lemon meringue pie. But on a deeper level, I have everything in common with them; hope and fear, pain and joy, weakness and strength. After my difficult week, my morning at the Kotel cleared my mind. ‘Lunching with the ladies’ energized me. It gave me strength to face the problems and stresses I had taken a break from.


There’s nothing better in a time of stress than a friend.


Except, of course, a friend with chocolate chocolate chip ice cream.

Hugs from friends

I’m allowed to be sappy once in a while


[1] True, not every acquaintance is a friend. Also true, you only NEED one friend, but really? The more the merrier, no?